‘AS’ and homophobic bullying.
My main focus for this post was going to be ‘AS’, a 15 year-old Italian boy, but, from reading the article about his death, I found some more articles and I will leave the links to the websites at the end of the post. I’ll also write about homophobic bullying, as that is what happened to ‘AS’.
‘AS’, as I just said, was a 15 year-old Italian. He was cyber-bullied and bullied at school for wearing pink and, at some point, going to school with nail-varnish on.
Now, there are two guys in my class, my ex and my best friend, who both wear nail-varnish. There is nothing wrong with it, and they don’t get any shit about it, because they won’t take any shit about it, and we always defend each other. But ‘AS’ didn’t have that.
So, as usual, I’m going to go into how he was feeling. I want to ask you to put yourself in his place. Put yourself in his place and think about how you’d feel.
I myself am not a fan of the colour pink. As a matter of fact, I hate it. But I don’t hate on people that wear pink. If they want to wear pink, fine by me. None of my business. But there is always that one little thorn that won’t piss off and will stick his or her nose in something that isn’t their business.
‘AS’ just wanted to be himself, and I’m guessing that he was actually proud of being gay. I think he was very brave. So damn brave, probably knowing what the mentality about gays was like and still being open about it. It was his choice to wear pink, so fucking what? He wore nail-varnish to school, again, so fucking what?
“My name is AS, and I’m proud to be gay. I want to wear pink. I want to be myself. I’m strong enough to be myself. But I can’t fight against the bullies.” that’s what I think when I put myself in his place. He couldn’t fight against the bullies. They degraded him, spat on him, beat him up, and probably said and did a lot of things I don’t even want to think about. I feel sick just thinking about ‘AS’ went through. I feel like crying when I put myself in his place. Scream, shout, beg, sob, cry and I feel vulnerable. For him.
He just wanted to be himself damn it! What’s so bad about that? And why the fuck would it be their business anyway? So what if you think he’s not ‘masculine’ enough just for wearing pink and painting his nails? Trust me, I know how much ‘masculinity’ is valued on the Mediterranean coast.
I live in a narrow-minded village where men come first, they are kings, saying even saying the slightest thing in a girly way could suddenly make you an outcast and acting like a prick gets you street cred.
“I cry every day because of what they do to me. I want to die, I’m not good enough. They pushed my head into the toilet and flushed it while they kicked me and hurt me. They called me names and left me there. I wanted to die. I still want to die.”
I think he might have said that once or twice, but in a different language and with different words, but the idea was the same. He was in agony. Even now, as I write this, I have tears in my eyes for him. He was stronger than the bullies, and showed it. He didn’t have to be masculine! He didn’t have to walk, talk, dress and act the way they do and he knew it. they were afraid of him, and jealous. Afraid because he was strong. Jealous because he wasn’t afraid to show who he really was. And it wasn’t a fair fight for him. Maybe if it had been one person bullying him, it would have been okay. Maybe if it had been two people and he had a person he could talk to that wasn’t his parents, it would have been okay. But having X number of people and no one to help him wasn’t fair. They ganged up on him and they used their numbers to their advantage. Not always a bad thing, if you use it for good.
They killed him. And I honestly hope that they feel guilty for what they did. I hope that they stop their macho attitude and think for just one second what they did to ‘AS’. That they realise how wrong it was. I can’t stop bullying, hate and unfairness on my own, but I damn well am going to try my hardest to lessen it. If it were up to me, all the bullies on the planet would have a neon sign above their heads saying “I am a bully” and they would all end up in jail for a couple of years. Harsh? Maybe. Harsh from experience? Fuck yeah. Harsh for the unheard people? Fuck to the Hell yeah.(<—-that doesn't make sense, but humour me.)
I want to protect the people that need protecting, no matter how strong they are. Yes, also the bullies that need protecting. Some people become bullies because they have a bad home life. I want to protect them from that and make them see that they shouldn’t and mustn’t bully. People who are spoilt brats and bully because they think they’re better than the rest can go fuck themselves. People who are too narrow-minded and from those little villages that got stuck somewhere in time can stay in those villages and leave the open-minded people the fuck alone.
On to the next topic before I get to the links:
What is the point of bullying? …
What is the point in homophobic bullying? …
So why the Hell do people do it? What I said earlier. Basically to make themselves feel better for one reason or another.
I’m only giving the links to the website, not to the articles themselves, because if not I’ll end up with more articles and links than words. Have a look through some articles, or use keywords like ‘suicide’, ‘bullying’, etc. to find some of the ones I’ve found.
I want to stop any unfairness in the world, also the hunger in Africa, the poverty, etc. and I find that bullying and acceptance are a good start.
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